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What FC Dallas should offer Houston for Erick Torres

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Jeff Swinger-USA TODAY Sports

Grant Wahl with Sports Illustrated is reporting that Houston is currently shopping Mexican international striker Erick "Cubo" Torres. No doubt that he's going to be in high demand given his age 22, upside and marketing potential, and Dallas will no doubt be interested in seeing what the going rate is.

Mr. Owen Coyle, while I have your attention, I would like to propose the following in exchange for Cubo. You can get back to me in the comments section if you'd like to proceed.

  • 2 gallons of Blue Bell ice cream, flavors of your choosing
  • A year's supply of Whataburger coupons
  • 6 cases of Bud Light
  • One of our Homegrowns' Chipotle card
  • 12,000 manakins outfitted in Dynamo gear to fill your stands
  • 1 Brita filter
  • 2 dozen tortillas
  • 17 Southwest airlines drink coupons
  • $20 Uber credit for when you need to shuttle your team to the airport for away games.
  • And I went through my kid's piggy bank and found $38.27 that she would like to contribute too.
Ball's in your court Houston. You know where to get in touch with us.